MY BLOG POSTS

I got really frustrated this week. It always happens right before a big event – I get focused and overwhelmed and cranky, and I usually blow up at some people and have a couple mini-meltdowns.

But it’s not totally my fault. I am passionate about things, and I get upset when other people don’t share those passions, don’t work the way I think they should, don’t do what I ask…

Except that it really IS my fault. I was the one that blew up, the one that got frustrated, the one that chose to let my emotions determine my actions.

When I accepted that responsibility, refused to allow myself to assign guilt to others, I actually felt better. I confessed my sin to God and to those I offended, and I felt relieved. Done.

But it doesn’t always happen that way. Many times, I spend a long time in the “it’s not my fault” phase. I wallow in anger over what other people did, replay their role in my melt-down over and over again until I am even more furious as them for what they made me do.

When I do that, I am miserable, people around me are miserable. My relationship with God and others is ugly.

We live in a world where we are actually encouraged to blame others for our problems: “I had to cheat – my parents would kill me if I got a bad grade!” “He told me he loved me. I assumed we’d get married…” “She spread rumors about me, so I spread rumors about her!” I could go on – I’m sure you could, too. Our bad behavior is not our fault.

But here’s the truth: It IS our fault. We are all sinners. We all fall short of the glory of God. We are all in need of the forgiveness that is only offered from God through Jesus. Our enemy will do anything to keep us from acknowledging that. And blaming others has worked since the beginning of time (“The woman you gave me made me eat that fruit!”).

Don’t fall into the “it’s not my fault” trap. Don’t let others pull you into it. It’s the easy way out, a cop-out, and it leaves you dissatisfied, even more frustrated. It destroys your relationships with others and with God.

“Confession is good for the soul.” It is freeing. Confession allows us to tell God what he already knows and humbles us before him and others so we can better reflect his glory – the glory of a God who uses imperfect people to accomplish his perfect will.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

~I Corinthians 13:4-8a

“Don’t change.”

I see this line – or something like it — over and over in  birthday cards, encouragement posts, and yearbooks. And while I understand the sentiment, I don’t like it.

Why?

Because we should be changing. All the time. I cringe to think what I would be like if I hadn’t changed since high school. Big hair, big mouth, I was constantly seeking attention, always thinking about myself. I still struggle with self-centeredness. I think I always will. But God has helped me grow in that area, to think more about others and less about me, to make pleasing Him my priority and not be so concerned with pleasing others.

Admittedly, some people change for the worse. Some folks who used to be kind and gentle become bitter and jaded. That’s not the kind of change I’m talking about. That kind of change results from wrong responses to difficulties faced in life. People mistreat us, circumstances don’t work out the way we think they should, and we get angry. The anger festers. We turn into the Hulk, scary and awkward, frightening people around us.

What God wants is for us to grow from the difficult times. James says “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials…” (James 1:2). He goes on to say that these trials make our faith stronger, make us more like Christ. There are several passages of Scripture that affirm this, reinforce the fact that a problem-free life isn’t our goal. That won’t make us happy. But learning to face problems on our knees, seeking God’s help, His strength, His purposes, allows us to be joyful even in the worst of times.

And these lessons take a lifetime. If I am growing in my relationship with Christ, I should be able to recognize God’s fingerprints in my soul every year, molding me and shaping me into someone who looks more and more like Him.

Change is good. Change is necessary. Change reflects maturity and growth.

So change. Please!

I used to think I should read the Bible because that would make God happy. Like God was a moody teacher: “Do what he wants or he’ll make your life miserable.” But, as I grew in my faith, I started wanting to read my Bible, loving to study it. It is full of Truth. It is full of hope. It is full of God’s instructions for how I should live.

The Bible allows me to know God – his heart, his passion, his holiness, his power. The Bible shows me who I am and helps me see who I can be.

Yes, it can be confusing. Yes, it can be difficult. Yes, it is controversial. So what? Study it anyway. Read it for yourself. Don’t let other people tell you what it says. Check what they say to make sure it’s true.

James gives us great advice: “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.” (James 1:5). I have found this verse to be true over and over again. I have asked God to help me understand what his word says, and he has answered those prayers time and time again.

So in this age of words, words everywhere, don’t neglect THE Word.

“The grass withers, the flower fades, But  the word of our God stands forever.” Is. 40:8