I got really frustrated this week. It always happens right before a big event – I get focused and overwhelmed and cranky, and I usually blow up at some people and have a couple mini-meltdowns.
But it’s not totally my fault. I am passionate about things, and I get upset when other people don’t share those passions, don’t work the way I think they should, don’t do what I ask…
Except that it really IS my fault. I was the one that blew up, the one that got frustrated, the one that chose to let my emotions determine my actions.
When I accepted that responsibility, refused to allow myself to assign guilt to others, I actually felt better. I confessed my sin to God and to those I offended, and I felt relieved. Done.
But it doesn’t always happen that way. Many times, I spend a long time in the “it’s not my fault” phase. I wallow in anger over what other people did, replay their role in my melt-down over and over again until I am even more furious as them for what they made me do.
When I do that, I am miserable, people around me are miserable. My relationship with God and others is ugly.
We live in a world where we are actually encouraged to blame others for our problems: “I had to cheat – my parents would kill me if I got a bad grade!” “He told me he loved me. I assumed we’d get married…” “She spread rumors about me, so I spread rumors about her!” I could go on – I’m sure you could, too. Our bad behavior is not our fault.
But here’s the truth: It IS our fault. We are all sinners. We all fall short of the glory of God. We are all in need of the forgiveness that is only offered from God through Jesus. Our enemy will do anything to keep us from acknowledging that. And blaming others has worked since the beginning of time (“The woman you gave me made me eat that fruit!”).
Don’t fall into the “it’s not my fault” trap. Don’t let others pull you into it. It’s the easy way out, a cop-out, and it leaves you dissatisfied, even more frustrated. It destroys your relationships with others and with God.
“Confession is good for the soul.” It is freeing. Confession allows us to tell God what he already knows and humbles us before him and others so we can better reflect his glory – the glory of a God who uses imperfect people to accomplish his perfect will.
